I am now officially more than half way through my pregnancy, which in some ways is totally unfathomable but in other ways isn’t quite far enough for me as I’m DYING to meet our baby already! We had our 20 week scan this week, and breathed the biggest sigh of relief when we were told jacpot mini was developing just fine and got to see them kicking their legs around on screen again.
I’m trying not to fill the blog with too much pregnancy news, although I appear to find it hard not to mention it at least once in every post (sorry about that), as I know it’s not interesting to everyone and I know there are many people who probably don’t want to hear it, for various reasons. Since the word go in this pregnancy I have been a little wary as to how much I should share, and there was part of me that wanted to keep the whole thing away from the blog and just experience it personally. But this blog has always been a personal diary above all else, and I can’t deny that writing about things that are happening to me first hand is my favourite form of blogging, not to mention pretty therapeutic for me. Plus I think you’ve come to expect quite a big chunk of honesty and personal thoughts and feelings from me by now right?
I’ve kept up my pregnancy diary throughout the last 6 weeks, like I did in the first trimester and so in what will probably feel like no time at all you’ll be able to read all about what the second trimester has been like for us (spoiler – it’s been challenging). But seeing as reaching 20 weeks and having our 20 week scan felt like quite a monumental marker in the journey, I thought I’d check in with one of those Q&As I’ve seen kicking around, and update you on how everything is going.
How far along: 20 weeks (halfway there!)
Days until due date: 137
The bump: There are occasional days where it looks quite big but they are fleeting before it settles down again. On the whole it’s still sitting quite flat and you could look at me and think I’d just eaten a big meal rather than think I was pregnant. Some days I get offered a seat on the tube when it’s popped out a little but it’s still fairly small and not that obvious unless I wear something really tight fitting. We’ve been taking a picture like the one above every week since week 15 so that we can make a little timelapse at the end of the pregnancy and I always feel like there’s no difference when I first look at the photo, and then I compare them and realise there really is!! As you can see, it’s not quite bump like yet though.
How big is baby? According to the apps they are around 17 cm or 6 inches long and 28kg this week. The size of a Mango!
Weight changes: I’m not really keeping track of my weight, as I never really have. I get weighed by the midwife and she tells me my weight gain is on track and normal so that’s enough for me. I feel bigger in myself – my waist is gone, my boobs are bigger, my thighs are a little chunkier and my hips and bum have definitely expanded but I’m trying really hard to remember that it’s all for the baby and not lament my old figure too much. It’s hard though – I miss my waist for sure, and my slim legs!
Stretch marks? Not yet, a few tiny tiny ones at the side of my stomach near my hips but I have a feeling they might have been existing ones that have just become a bit more noticeable. I’m using a moisturiser on my belly every morning and a body oil before bed. My bump hasn’t got that big yet though so I don’t think my muscles have actually done much stretching. This could all change very soon.
Symptoms/feelings: Without wanting to complain too much, I’ve been having a bit of a rough couple of weeks and have been finding the general task of being pregnant more difficult than I expected. Well, actually I’d say since about week 14 I haven’t really felt great. I’ve been suffering daily migraines for the last little while, which has been pretty hard and has made working life all the more difficult as so much of my work is computer facing. I’ve also been getting bad back ache when I walk too much in a day and am generally still not back on track energy wise. We’ve had a lot going on so I guess I haven’t exactly been taking it easy, but with some added personal stress, sleep not coming easily, the toll my body has been under plus those pesky hormones, I’d say it’s all been quite exhausting and draining. So far this week has been slightly better. I won’t say good, as we’re not quite there yet but I’m hoping that I might finally be turning a bit of a corner and relaxing into things slightly. It’s definitely hard work though, and there seems to be a new worry or hurdle almost daily which I gather for a first pregnancy is just the way it is. I’m trying to just let it happen and accept that I’ll have good days and bad days, but right now I certainly would love the scales to tip a little more in the good day direction.
Cravings: Not as such. I’m really enjoying avocado right now, and as I know it’s one of the pregnancy super foods I’m eating lots of it. Cold water at all times. And juicy fruits like large oranges or grapefruits.
Food aversions: Baby might be a vegetarian in the making as certain meats (particularly red meat) just doesn’t appeal much anymore. Mince, steak and cured meats such as chorizo are off the menu right now, as are eggs which are making me feel a little queazy but other than that I haven’t had to change my diet much at all.
Sleep: Good nights and bad nights. For a while I was struggling to get to sleep as I had too much on my mind and was waking up with really sore shoulders and neck each morning from tensing and being in an awkward position. Thankfully I’ve given myself an extra pillow and propped myself up a bit and that seems to be helping a little. Still occasionally getting a sore back/hips during the night and struggling to find a comfortable position but also managing to tire myself out most days so that I just conk out. The most annoying thing is having to get up in the middle of the night to go to the loo – sigh.
Exercise: Lots of walking but other than that I’ve been a bit lax on the exercise front and really need to get back into it. There just seems to be so much going on all of the time and I’m constantly exhausted but I must get on top of it.
Best moment this week: Getting the all clear at our 20 week scan and getting to see jacpot mini wriggling and kicking their legs around inside me – still so surreal that all that is going on in my body, but we were both so overwhelmed and relieved to see them doing well.
Worst moment this week: Having an emotional break down one morning because my make up didn’t go on right – these hormones are crazy sometimes!
Miss anything? Am I allowed to say LOTS. On the food side not so much as my diet hasn’t changed too dramatically and apart from occasionally wishing I could join friends in that glass of Prosecco I can’t complain. BUT I really miss wearing a lot of my pre-pregnancy clothes, and especially as I’ve been busy packing lately, I’m finding myself digging out pretty skirts and dresses that I can no longer squeeze into and thinking ‘when will I wear you again?’. Also high heels – oh all the pretty shoes that are now even more of a struggle to wear for any length of time, I miss you so. And I miss my energy. My ability to go-go-go all day and gets lots done. I miss travelling, and going to events and blogger meets (hopefully I can do more of that once I start feeling a little better). I miss my waist. And generally I just miss feeling normal and like ‘me’ instead of constantly thinking of baby first, me second but I’m pretty sure that feeling is gone for good now haha.
Maternity clothes: Not yet. Bump has actually shrunk a little again and is lying quite flat most of the time so I’ve actually started fitting back in to some of my baggier jeans and stretchy clothes. For the most part, I’m wearing loose dresses and high waisted skirts with tops or jumpers and have generally just sized up one size in any new dresses or trousers I’ve bought. Looking forward to bump becoming rounder so I can start dressing it properly rather than just feeling a bit chubs.
Movement: Little flutters occasionally, especially at night but no real solid movement yet. It’s hard to tell what’s baby and what’s just my normal stomach gurgles.
Gender: We’ve decided not to find out so it will be a lovely surprise!
Belly button in/out: In but starting to pop out more.
Mood: A little fraught lately, as we’ve had a lot going on and things have been more manic than we’d ideally like. Plus I’m a born worrier, always have been. But also really happy and excited, especially after the scan this week and now that we know mini is doing well. I really just can’t wait to meet them! I have dreams and sometimes just moments during the day when I imagine myself with a baby, and try to consider what they might look like or what their personality will be, will they be like me or like GB? Will they also be a ginger boy (or girl)? – it’s really lovely and terribly exciting.
Looking forward to: Now that we’ve passed the 20 week mark and know that all is going fine with baby, I’m excited to start researching and looking into some of the big things we might need to buy ahead of February in time for their arrival. And I can finally indulge my Mum and let her buy Baby Gro’s to her hearts content. Also very much looking forward to getting moved and in to our new home so I can start decorating and giving in to that nesting instinct.
I’d love to hear from you if you’re also preggers, as right now I can’t get enough of reading about people’s experiences. Please drop me links to any of either your own posts or ones you’ve read from others in the comments below and I’ll be sure to check them out.